The MatrIEx

November 30. 2004 10:20 3 comments Category:

Morpheus: Microsoft is our enemy, Firefox, but when you're on the internet, you look around. What do you see? Business men, teachers, lawyers, carpenters. The very people we are trying to save. But until we do, these people are still IE users. You have to understand, most of these people are not ready to switch to a browser that doesn't come included on their desktop when they bring their computers home from Best Buy and pop in the "2000 Free Hours!" AOL CD. And many of them are so inert, so hopelessly dependent on Microsoft that they will fight to protect it. Were you listening to me Firefox, or were you looking at the woman surfing the hot lesbo porn?

Firefox: I was...

Morpheus: Look again.

*Woman has turned into Bill Gates, introducing new "standard" to break non-IE browsers.*

Morpheus: Freeze it!

Firefox: What is it?

Morpheus: IE-only standards. That means that anyone we haven't converted over is an audience for crappy sites that are only written for IE. On the internet, you see this everywhere. We have survived by being standards-based, by working to be compatible. But these false "standards" are the gatekeepers.

Firefox: Whoa.

Morpheus: I won't lie to you, Firefox. Every single company or product that has stood their ground, everyone who was fought Microsoft has been crushed or acquired. But where they have failed, you will succeed.

Firefox: Why?

Morpheus: I saw Microsoft crush Netscape's market share. Men have come up with fantastic innovations only to find them incompatible, or MS copies it in the next version of Windows. Yet their programs are still based on factory-style programming and decisions made by pointy-hairs. Because of that, they will never be as secure or as functional as you can be.

Firefox: What are you trying to tell me, that I can block pop-ups?

Morpheus: I'm trying to tell you that when you're ready, you won't have to
Post RSS Tags: ,

Comments

10/6/2007 7:18:46 AM

Chevy

did you write that?  i love it!

Chevy

10/6/2007 7:18:46 AM

Bryan Peters

I can't claim to have written it.  It was an email forwarded to me from a fellow techie.  I did a search for it on the web, but alas, it remains "author unkown".

Bryan Peters

10/6/2007 7:18:46 AM

Anonymous

God!
To much, to much, stop it...hahahaha!
Nice, very nice!

Anonymous

Add comment


(Will show your Gravatar icon)

  Country flag

biuquote
  • Comment
  • Preview
Loading